I believe I've spoken before about who "THEY" are. You know the ones who say you shouldn't swim for an hour after eating. "THEY" used to say, "Don't lift your arms in the air while you are pregnant or the umbilical cord could wrap around the babies throat" Of course a new and much "hipper" group of "THEY'S" disagreed with the old "THEY's" (now referred to as "THEM"). Now THEY say it is perfectly ok to lift your arms just be sure that after the baby is born that it MUST sleep on his stomach .....back ....left side ......right side.....sigh.
Hhhmmmm.. I had a point.
They said the disc fusion would be difficult. They said recovery was going to be very long and boring at times and I would probably become inpatient. They said I couldn't lift anything over 5 pounds and and the "cute" little saying of "No BLT'S"...bending, lifting, twisting....like I could possibly do any of those things in this space capsule I have to wear at all waking moments.
Ok, So They said it would be Difficult...WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA......OK, so I woke up screaming. I suppose some could say that is difficult. I personally would refer to it as (Thesaurus time), beastly, horrendous, grim, heinous, and atrocious....to name a few. They must have missed the 200 times that I told them I had an extremely high tolerance to pain medication AND the fact that I had brought all of my meds in to prove to them that I took an extremely high amount. They must have thought I was joking. I have vague memories of people yelling more Morphine, Valium, Dilaudid STAT!! (P.S Did I mention that STAT means take your time and wander around aimlessly?)
P.S. Did I mention that STAT means take your time and wander around aimlessly?
P.S.S Did I mention I'm still taking the Dilaudid and the Valium?
If I remember correctly, the last time I had a surgery, I woke up quite peacefully in the recovery room. Not screaming and clawing like I had been shot.
Of course many of you are familiar with the "Slight Pressure" you are to expect while giving birth. Or the "Quick Pinch" while they are sticking an IV in your arm with the diameter of a pencil....for the 5th time. "Oops, sorry we'll get that vein next time for sure.....?" LIES, I tell you!! LIES!!
A-hem.....excuse me I think they forgot to mention the mood swings.
I'm getting tired and have SUCH a story to tell! But it's time for my meds and then....well, after the meds, who care?
So, until then.....Don't believe a word THEY say!!
P.S. THANK YOU SO SO MUCH LEA FOR THE CARD!!!!